Is Singapore's 'Toxic' Culture Driving Down Birth Rates? A Reddit Thread Explodes

A recent Reddit thread on r/SingaporeRaw has sparked a lively and at times heated debate about the perceived toxicity of Singaporean culture and its impact on the decision to have children. Kicking off the discussion, an anonymous user, Agile-Tea1751, laid bare their reasons for choosing not to have kids in the island nation, citing a litany of societal pressures.

The original poster, Agile-Tea1751, began by lamenting what they see as a deeply ingrained negative culture:

The culture here is too toxic due to the endless comparing, judging others, toxic work culture, sinkie pawn sinkie and shaming when shit hits the fan... Until people here know how to smell the roses, be inclusive, open minded, polite, accept theres no such thing as perfectness in life i would not want my future generations to suffer in such disgusting culture!

This sentiment resonated deeply with many, quickly drawing a flood of comments from users sharing similar anxieties and frustrations. User oorangesss extended the sentiment even further, suggesting that the pressure extends beyond having children to even owning pets, highlighting a general desire to conserve resources for oneself and aging parents:

Same, I don't intend on getting a pet either. Nowadays even having a pet feels like having a kid, when ppl ask why you don't have a pet when you're childless. Why can't people just be single and solo without having any partner/kid/pet.

The discussion quickly branched into broader societal critiques. Many commenters echoed concerns about the intense competition and perceived overpopulation. Qkumbazoo, a Top 1% Commenter, articulated this bluntly:

SG is objectively overpopulated, overcrowding everywhere, competition for schools, housing, and good jobs getting unbearably competitive and cutthroat.

Adding to the economic and social pressures, invigo79 posited a cynical view on the government's stance on population:

The government and companies want more kids to become their future slaves. Don't let them win.

This idea of a societal "rat race" and its implications for future generations was a recurring theme. Critical-Copy-7218 expressed pity for non-elites raising children in Singapore, questioning the value of lineage without substantial assets and suggesting it might be "pure cruelty" to bring children into such a system unless one belongs to the elite class. They later added:

Most parents I know are dual income, sending kids to childcare. Or, taking time off from work to join kids mugging for exams only to ill-prepare them for a lifetime of rat race.

However, not everyone shared such grim outlooks. While acknowledging the challenges, some users offered contrasting perspectives. KoishiChan92, a verified user with two children, offered a more moderate view, advising others to navigate societal pressures rather than succumb to them:

No one should have kids they don't want. But also, if someone wants to have kids, it's not that grim, I've got two kids. Stay away from those parents WhatsApp chats and ignore any comparisons going on (easier to do now since less friends are having kids lol).

When pressed by the original poster about their motivation for having children, KoishiChan92 admitted:

Nothing logical tbh. Have just always just known I wanted to be a parent?

Wiserlul also weighed in on the "internal motivators" for parenthood, listing biological instincts, emotional fulfillment, a desire for legacy, and the unique love and connection children bring.

The thread also featured moments of sharp humor and direct challenges. Founders_Mem_90210, another Top 1% Commenter, stirred the pot by directly asking the original poster:

Do you even have a partner of the opposite biological sex in the first place to try and conceive a child with? If not, don't talk so much about why you aren't going to have kids in SG.

This blunt query elicited a flurry of mock concern and amusement from other users, with yellowbumble-B comically exclaiming:

"999 i would like to report a murder"

The discussion underscored deeper concerns about national identity and the role of foreign talent. BedOk577 commented:

The competition is too intense...it's like playing Survival in Asia where the weakest gets eliminated. The pawn culture here is very real and hits very hard. Moreover I don't feel motivated to have kids when 90% of the people in MRT are foreigners. There's no sense of national identity in SG.

In conclusion, the Reddit thread paints a vivid picture of the complex factors influencing family planning decisions in Singapore. From deep-seated cultural anxieties and intense competition to economic pressures and philosophical debates about the meaning of life and legacy, the conversation highlights a population grappling with the challenges of modern living in a highly developed, densely populated nation. While some feel compelled to opt out of parenthood altogether, others, driven by less logical motivations, find ways to make it work, often by consciously disengaging from the very "toxic" elements that others seek to escape.